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THE OLD DUN COW
Some friends and I in a public house were playing dominoes one night
When into the room the barman came, his face all chalky white
"What's up?" says Brown, "have you seen a ghost?
Have you seen your Aunt Maria?"
"Oh, me Aunt Maria be buggered," says he "The bloody pub's on fire!"
"On fire?" says Brown, "What a bit of luck! Everybody follow me.
Down to the cellar, if the fire's not there, we'll have a rare old
spree."
So we all went down after good old Brown, and booze we could not miss.
And we weren't there five minutes or more, till we were all half-pissed.
And there was Brown upside down, licking up the whiskey off the
floor. "Booze! Booze!" the firemen cried as they came knocking at the door.
"Don't let them in till it's all mopped up," somebody shouted "McIntyre!"
And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk when the Old Dun Cow
caught fire.
The Smith went over to the port wine tub, and gave it a few hard knocks.
And started taking off his pantaloons, likewise his shoes and socks.
:Hold on" says Brown "we can't have that. You can't do that in here...
Don't go washin' your trotters in port-wine tub, when we've got all
this Lite beer."
Well there came an awful crash, and half the bloody roof gave way.
We were drowned in the firemens' hose, still, we were going to stay.
So we got some tacks, and out old wet slacks, and we nailed ourselves
inside.
And we sat there swallyin' pints of stout till we were bleary-eyed.
Chorus. |
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