Bamf! Now all channels show endless reruns of I Love Lucy, night after night, day after day, even the talk shows discuss nothing but I Love Lucy reruns. Now, everytine you hear "LUUUCCCYYY! I'm HOOOOME!" you want to throw something at him...
I wish we got more snow in the wintertime.
Slàn agus beannachd, Allen R. Alderman
'S i Alba tìr mo chridhe. 'S i Gàidhlig cànan m' anama. Scotland is the land of my heart. Gaelic is the language of my soul.
Shazzam! Your wish will be granted after some beta testing, and you have been designated to test drive one of the cars that runs on purified leftover frying oil recycled from fast food restaurants. Now they can smell you coming, dogs chase your car, biting the tires, children follow you up the street demanding a happy meal, and the very sight of a McNuggett makes you want to barf.
I wish peoples' irrational fear of each other would go away forever.
Kablooy! Now every station and every channel plays nothing but bagpipe music day in and day out. At first it was lovely...but there was no way you could connect to the outside world. No news, no other forms of music or talk radio. You became disconnected, alone. Now you are livining in your bedroom with endless bagpipes playing in your head.... Wuuuurrrrrrrr!!!!!
I wish I was thin.
There's a dear little plant that grows in our Isle Twas St . Patrick himself, sure, that set it; And the sun of his labour with pleasure did smile, And with dew from his eye often wet it. It grows through the bog, through the brake, through the Mireland, and they call it the dear little shamrock of Ireland.
Shazamm!! They have accomplished your dream grass after years of genetic engineering, and you'll never have to mow again. And they will do your whole yard over for less than fifty bucks! The only hitch is the grass has razor-sharp edges and such a spreading root system that no flowers can grown near it. Oh, and the deep purplish-gray color, but they are working on that.
I wish I owned a good bed-and-breakfast inn for hillwalkers in Sutherland or Ross-shire.
Ta-daaaa! You don't! Work is coming to you, and you are all camping out and doing the work in your kitchen, bathroom, bedroom and living room in bathrobes and slippers until all the work is done. (Is it fun to picture this? )
I wish rainy days were as much fun now as they were when I was little.