| You Know You're From...when...
Posted: 09-Dec-2004, 03:24 PM
The Gypsy Artist
Group: Celtic Princess
Realm: Wherever life takes me.
| I laughed out loud when I read the Michigan one, it's painfully true. I live 45 minutes away from Detroit and about 45 minutes away from Flint, so it's a little bit of both. I do spend a lot of time down there in Detroit, though.
You Know You're From Detroit When...
You call McNichols 6 Mile
You pronounce Lahser as "Lasher"
You add an "s" on Livernois
You own a pair of gators in a variety of colors
Your gators match your suit (pink, purple, green, etc.)
You`ve had to wait forever for the DOT bus
Your car payment is higher than your rent
You outfit cost more than your car payment
You get your nails and hair done every week just to go to the mall
You can do any of the 3,000 hustles
You take ballroom hustle lessons
You airbrush your toenails
You put nail tips and acrylic on your toenails
You`re familiar with the term "Dress to Impress"
You can find a cabaret on any given Saturday of the year
You listen to Mason in the morning on 102.7 FM
You know the words to "Hello Detroit" by Sammy Davis Jr.
You are mad about the Joe Louis Statue (the fist) in the middle of Jefferson
Your neighborhood church is across the street or next door to a liquor store AND a Chinese food restaurant
You don`t know the difference between winter white and summer white
You've been to a club at 1 am and paid $20 to party for one hour
You can buy an outfit, activate your cell phone, and buy lunch at the corner liquor store
You get your hair "did"
You have Mardi Gras beads from Fishbone`s hanging from your rear view mirror
Youo've stopped at a shrimp shack after 2 am (because it tastes the best at this time)
You think that Lou's Deli (the Mc Nichols location) has the best corned beef sandwiches!
You shop at Cest La Vie
You've had to drive a half a mile to make a left turn (The Michigan Left)
You drink Faygo pop
You've knocked all the hub caps off your car - and your alignment's totally out of whack
You go to the Auto Show to find men / women
You own a red leather outfit
You shop at Mr. Alan`s to get the 2 for $50 deal
You shop at City Slicker shoes and the Broadway
You know the words to the City Slicker Shoes and the Broadway radio commercials
You've been to the Festival in Hart Plaza
You own a Navigator or an Expedition and you live with your mother
The Cass Corridor is your jogging route.
Wednesday is Metro Times day.
You have a taste for coney dogs.
You can dodge potholes without dropping your cell phone.
You can name the CEOs of all the Big 3.
You can't get to sleep without the sound of sirens.
You hate the city, but you'll kick the ass of anyone who disses it.
You love Vernor's and Better Made Chips
You refer to the city as "the D."
You swim at Belle Isle beach.
You **TOS VIOLATION** about the need for mass transit but know deep down you'd never use it.
You know the given names of all the expressways.
People get scared when you say you're from here.
You have two cars: One for daily use, and one hooptie for extreme occasions.
A six-street intersection with a Michigan turn seems logical.
You think Devil's Night is celebrated everywhere.
If it's less than 10 blocks away, you drive anyway.
You are connected to Eminem by 3 or fewer people.
You know Eminem and Kid Rock are not actually from Detroit, but Warren (a suburb) and a small farm town.
You have ridden the People Mover.
When you pull up to a red light, you roll up your windows.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Detroit.
I'm drinking Faygo as I post this
Peace cannot be achieved through violence, it can only be attained through understanding. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you judge people you have no time to love them. ~Mother Teresa
Posted: 09-Dec-2004, 04:17 PM
Rocky Mtn Highlander and Renaissance Scot
You Know You're From Colorado When...
People move onto the highway at 15 miles an hour.
You have absolutely no recognizable accent.
If the humidity gets above 25%, you consider it "muggy".
You only go to Central City when friends are in from out of town.
You have been skiing less than 10 times in your life
You think 5-points is a ghetto.
You are the third car to run a red light after it has changed.
You say things like "I don't care how big Golden is,
it's still a one-horse town".
You think only stupid people get lost in your town.
When giving directions, you never say "Turn left, turn right", it's always go West, then South.
During a thunderstorm you wonder "which I-25 underpass is flooding".
You never plan a picnic between 3:30 and 6:00 in Spring or Summer months.
If it rains more than 2 days straight you compare the weather to being in Seattle.
You voted for higher taxes to fund Coors field, but voted down taxes for public transportation.
You have a broken windshield.
You see no reason to travel to Aurora.
The only RTD bus you've been on is the 16th Street shuttle.
You carry your $3,000 mountain bike on top of your $500 car.
You thought "Californication" would be banned by Amendment 2.
You think "South Park" is a place to stop for gas on your way to Buena Vista.
You have a business degree and are frying burgers at a McDonald's in Vail.
You have a flat tire in your refrigerator and your garage.
You own a big dog named Aspen, Buck, Cheyenne or Dakota that wears a bandanna.
You cast out your fishing line while white-water rafting.
You've never seen the tourist attractions in your own city.
You think a pass does not involve a football or a woman.
You are 82 years old and take up snowboarding.
Your real Y2K fear was running out of Celestial Seasonings tea and trail mix.
The entire top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
You personally wouldn't pay $10 per head to drive up Pikes Peak unless it was the only mountain on earth, but you tell all our house-guests to do it.
You get depressed after one day of foggy weather.
You think that formal wear is ironed denim.
North means "mountains to the left;" south is "mountains to the right;" and east and west are where all those damned liberals keep moving in from.
You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels "sticky" and you notice the sky is no longer blue.
You consider a three-piece suit to be a pair of shorts, a sweatshirt and Birkenstocks.
You see your East Coast relatives now more than when you lived there.
You think gun control is a steady hand.
You can run up 10 flights of stairs without huffing and puffing.
You've stood on solid ground and looked down on an airplane in flight.
You know what the "Peoples Republic of Boulder" means.
You're a meat eating vegetarian.
You think the major food groups are Boulder Bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.
You've been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate your local sports team's victory.
You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can't get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.
You know the correct pronunciation of Buena Vista.
When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.
Your car insurance costs more than your car.
You have surge protectors on every outlet.
April showers bring May blizzards.
You see someone riding a Harley in a snowstorm, and you look closer to see if it's anyone you know.
"Timberline" is someplace you have actually been. Many times.
You know what a "Chinook" is. You know what a "rocky mountain oyster" is. You know what a "fourteener" is. But you don't know what a "turn signal" is.
A bear on your front porch doesn't bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does.
Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning-rod.
People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do.
Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn't seem strange.
Thunder has set off your car alarm.
A sudden loss of cabin pressure is not a big deal.
"Where we're going, we don't need roads!"
You know where Doc Holliday's grave is.
You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.
Driving directions usually include 'Go over ____ Pass...'
You've used "checking for ticks" as an excuse to get someone naked.
You've gone skiing in July. You've gone sunbathing in January. They were both in the same year.
You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both downstream
You know the elevation of a town, but not its population.
You never pack away your coat and sweaters.
You can name only two people you know who were actually born in Colorado.
You call tumbleweed "groundcover".
You love your Broncos, your Avs, your Rockies, Nuggets - well you can't have everything.
You or someone you know plays golf 12 months of the year.
You don't have AC in your home, but you use it in your car all winter long.
If it snows in the morning you expect it to be gone by lunchtime.
You can name the states that make up the Four Corners.
You know what and where the Continental Divide is.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Colorado.
That's scarily true!
Deus Juvat "God Assists"
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
Robert A. Heinlein
Posted: 11-Dec-2004, 09:09 AM
Group: Celtic Nation
Realm: North Carolina
| One they forgot, "fruit juice" is made by soaking a couple of peaches (or other fruit of your choice) in moon shine. Most common at pig pickings when asked if "You would like a little fruit juice".
You Know You're From North Carolina When...
You've gotten used to the smell of cow manure on a car trip to Raleigh.
Saying "y'all" isn't just a cute expression; it actually means something.
There are big labrador retrievers in the back of every truck.
You give directions using KFC and Waffle House as landmarks.
You still see Dale Earndheart tributes on cars.
You can't imagine life without Bojangles' sweet tea
Your annual church fundraiser always deals with bbq and potato salad
You have a sunburn from May to October
Your 'heavy winter clothing' consists of some turtleneck sweaters, a fuzzy jacket, and your daddy's boots
Your family has fried chicken once a week
You can tell the difference between cotton fields and tobacco fields while driving
One of your neighbors has a confederate flag hanging on their front porch
Those "damn yankees" are taking over your school/church/workplace/neighborhood...
You've been "properly raised", and yankees love it when they hear you say "ma'am" and "sir"
You get your carbs from biscuits, rolls, pancakes, and grits
You know the difference between a "redneck" and a "hick".
You own at least one surf shop or seafood restaurant shirts.
No matter what those people in ohio say, we are still "first in flight"
The Coca-Cola 600 is as big as the Super Bowl
You prefer Chick-fil-a to KFC
You know pastry is a chicken stew, not a dessert item.
Every time you visit someone you?re offered something to eat and a glass of tea.
Your granddaddy always wore overalls and your grandma always wore an apron.
In summer you have home-grown tomatoes with every meal.
When it rains and the creek rises, everyone gathers to see how high it rose.
You know that "chunk" the ball means to throw it.
You've had a burger "all the way" - chili and slaw on it.
You can recognize a copperhead and your heart drops when you see one.
You have at least one relative that raises collards.
Your folks have taken trips to the mountains to look at leaves.
Your school classes were cancelled because of a hurricane.
You know Krispy Kreme makes the best doughnut.
You have an opinion about UNC. You went there and loved it, or you hate everyone who did.
You know the best BBQ is found in Lexington
You would rather eat at Bojangles's than McDonald's
You have actually uttered the phrase "It's too hot to go to the pool"
You faithfully drink Pepsi or Mt. Dew everyday of your life.
You have your own secret bbq sauce.
You or your neighbors have more hunting dogs than you have family members.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from North Carolina.
Ya'll drive safe and come back soon.
Posted: 11-Dec-2004, 09:29 AM
Group: Celtic Nation
Realm: Phenix City, AL - back in the good ole USA
| Well since we already have North Carolina here I thought I put my husbands homestate on here since we plan on moving there someday anyways.
So here it goes:
You Know You're From Maine When...
You've had arguments over the comparative quality of Fried Dough.
You call four inches of snow "a dusting."
You don't understand why there aren't fried clam shacks elsewhere in the county.
You know what an Irving is and the location of 15 of them.
You knew all the flavors at Perry's Nut House.
Your car is covered in yellow-green dust in May.
You can drive the Augusta traffic circle without slowing down.
You've hung out at a gravel pit.
You think a mosquito could be a species of bird.
You once skipped school and went to Bar Harbor, Old Orchard Beach or Reid State Park.
Even your school cafeteria made good chowder.
You've almost fallen asleep driving between Houlton and Presque Isle.
You know how to pronounce Calais.
You've made a meal out of a Jordan's red dye hot-dog, a bag of Humpty Dumpty potato chips and a can of soda.
You've gone to a Grange bean supper.
In high school, you (or a friend) packed Deering Ice Cream cones.
At least once in your life, a seagull pooped on your head.
At least once in your life you've said, "It smells like the mill in here."
There's a fruit and vegetable stand within 10 minutes of your house.
You crave Italian sandwiches at least weekly.
Your house converts to a B&B every July and August for people from away that you happen to know.
All year long you're tracking sand in the house-from the beach in the summer and the roads and sidewalks in the winter.
You have to have the sand cleaned out of your brake system every spring.
You do the majority of your shopping out of Uncle Henry's.
You've ditched the car on the side of the road somewhere because you thought you saw some good fiddleheads!
You know a lobster pot is a trap, not a kettle.
You know not to plant tender crops until the last full moon in May.
You go to the dump and bring back more than you brought.
You've watched "Murder she Wrote" and snickered at the stupid fake accents.
You know how to find the rope swing at the quarry.
You take the New Hampshire toll personally.
You always wave when you see a Maine license plate in another state.
When you're supposed to dress up, you wear flannel with a tie.
There's too much "stuff" in your 2 "cah" garage to get either of your cars into it.
You know what a frappe is.
L.L. Bean's not just a store, it's a way of life.
"The City" means exclusively Portland.
"Salt damage" is a viable insurance claim.
All of the traffic lights blink yellow at 10 o'clock at night.
It's not a storm - it's a Nor'eastah.
"Open 24/7" might as well be Greek.
More stores have "Bienvenue" flags than "Welcome" flags.
You eat ice cream with flavors like 'Moose Tracks" and "Maine Black Bear".
You know that a chocolate doughnut is not a white doughnut with chocolate frosting.
You wouldn't eat beans in tomato sauce or Manhattan clam chowder if you were starving!
As a child, you played outside in a snow storm without hat, mittens, scarf and with your jacket open because it was just a little cool.
The area around your back door is referred to as "the dooryard".
You eat potato chips with flavors such as "clam dip", "ketchup" and "dill pickle".
You call the basement "downcellah."
There is only one shopping plaza in town.
You use "wicked" as a multipurpose part of speech
Your pickup has more mud on it then the ground around it for a 15 foot radius.
More than 1/2 the meat in your freezer is moose.
You enjoy a hot chocolate more than a margarita.
If your "luxury vehicle" is a twelve-year-old rustbucket on wheels.
If your dog eats better than you do, and more often too.
If you never say what you paid for an item but how much you "give" for it.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Maine.
Posted: 11-Dec-2004, 10:20 AM
Madman with a box
Realm: Midlothian, IL
| Here's most of my family:
You Know You're From Iowa When...
Vacation means driving through the Amanas or going to Adventureland
Down South to you means Missouri
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Moines"
You know the answer to the question, :"Is this Heaven?"
You know where all the Yoders live (or Andersons, or Van den Bergs)
You know what "hawks" and "clones" are
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or vegetable
You can locate Iowa on the map
You've ever been on a "Geode Hunt"
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as the bun and is accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice
You say "catty-wampus" instead of "kitty-corner"
You've never taken public transportation
You have boiled fish in lye for Christmas
You know what "uff-da" means and how to use it properly
You know what "Amish Country" is
The only reason you go to Wisconsin or Missouri is to get fireworks
You know exactly where "Field of Dreams" was filmed
When someone says they are going out for dinner or supper, you know which meal they are talking about. You listen to "Paul Harvey" every day at noon.
You think of the major food groups as deer meat, beer, corn, and soy nuts.
You're pulled over and asked by the cop, "Had a little to much to drink, (your first name here)?
You own the complete "Dukes of Hazzard" video collection.
"Hick" is a style of clothing.
You can use the words, 'crik', 'holler', and 'skunk weed' in the same sentence.
Your Christmas gift, when you were ten years old was a shotgun (a BB gun if you were a 'townie').
You know someone personally who is involved in meth trade or manufacture.
Your idea of a party is throwing cans of WD40 in a campfire while you're drunk.
You've been to a rave in a barn.
You've had sex in the back of a truck ... amid cows.
You know that cows don't sleep standing up.
You're concerned about the rates of corn growth in Illinois as compared to that of Iowa's.
You listen to Ag Day at 6AM ... two hours after you get up in the morning.
You believe that trees in Iowa lean towards Nebraska ... because Nebraska sucks!
You know several people who still refer to Japanese cars as "rice-burners."
"Styx" plays a concert at the county fair, and people actually show up.
You don't get nervous when you walk into a biker bar (unless you're an Iowa City cop).
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Iowa.
Mike F.May the Irish hills caress you.
May her lakes and rivers bless you.
May the luck of the Irish enfold you.
May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you.
Posted: 11-Dec-2004, 11:06 AM
Group: Celtic Nation
Realm: Texas Panhandle
You Know You're From Amarillo When...
Rainfall is measured in hundredths of inches
An inch of rain causes streets to flood but it takes a foot of snow to close schools
People are happy if a picnic gets rained out
You've seen rain, sleet, snow and thunder all in the same storm
You consider plutonium to be good thing
You prefer to haul drinking water rather than drink tap water
You tell people you live in the tan brick house with a tan roof and attached two-car garage, and then realize that describes every house within a 2-mile radius
You can see a million stars at night from your patio
You've never seen smog
You know the soil temperature on any given day but can't recall what you had for breakfast
You've had to pull over and remove tumbleweeds from the grill of your car
You've canceled many golf games because of rain
Vacation means a weekend trip to Santa Fe
You can lose your purse and a total stranger will returns it
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Amarillo.
we live 90 miles NE of Amarillo, but it still fits.
"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion."
Posted: 02-Oct-2006, 09:27 PM
Musican/Ruler of the Dells/Warrior
Realm: Caer Portshire, Mist Hollow
| I'm surprised none of the other cheeseheads around here grabbed this one yet, but here goes....
You Know You're From Wisconsin When...
You can taste a difference in cheese made somewhere else
You own at least one tie with a or peice of jewelry with a Green Bay Packer theme
You can find and pronounce : Eau Claire, Oconomowoc, Menomonee Falls, Waukesha, and La Crosse, Fond du Lac.
You can correctly spell Milwaukee.
You know what "bubbler" means.
At least one of your family members works / worked in a cheese factory.
A holstein cow outside of Wisconsin makes you miss home.
You can taste the difference between apples grown up north and the ones that you can buy in the south.
When talking about the Green Bay Packers you refer to them as "we".
When the weather hits 0 degrees you decide that maybe it's time to get out a jacket instead of a sweatshirt.
The family gets together every week for fish fry at the local pub.
You know what a brat is, and they're at every outdoor event that your family has ever had.
You know how to make a very good sled out of normal household items.
Your love you outdoor pool because of how it doubles as an ice skating area during the winter.
You can tell the difference between the smell of cow manure and pig manure.
You have watched Fargo and not noticed an accent.
You drive around with the air conditioning on until it hits 30 degrees, because it just was so darn hot outside.
The local paper needs 6 pages to cover the Packers... in July!
Your best shirt has a big letter G on it.
You've said "Of course they'll win. They're God's team."
You think it's nice enough to swim when the temperature hits 50.
You family owns a "winter car" while the "good one" sits in the garage from Nov-Apr.
Your put ketchup on a charcoal grilled NY strip steak.
You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is one yard above the ground.
You think everyone from south of Madison has an accent.
You can identify a Michigan accent.
Down South to you means Chicago.
Traveling coast to coast means going from Superior to Milwaukee.
You can make sense out of the words "upnort" and "Trivers".
You have to go to Florida to get a tan in August.
You consider Madison exotic.
You can visit Luxemburg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Berlin, New London & Poland all in one afternoon.
You can recognize someone from Illinois from their driving.
You buy cat litter every winter, but you don't own a cat.
At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant or cannery.
You know what to do with a Blatz.
You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Bucky the Badger hangs on your Christmas tree even if you didn't go to University of Wisconsin Madison.
You're a member of the Polar Bear Club and proud of it.
You can use the word "ya der hey" easily in a sentence
You hear someone use the words "uff-dah" and you don't immediately break into uncontrollable laughter.
Your whole family wears green and gold to church on Sunday.
Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow next to your blue spruce.
You know how to polka
You own a cheesehead
You have cow pharaphenilia around your house, including your pajama pants
You know what a FIB is and can spot them a mile away.
You think of the major four food groups as cheese, beer, brats and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.
FFA was the most popular club in high school
You have eaten a cow pie at the State Fair.
There was at least one kid in your class who had to help milk cows in the morning
Country Kitchen is the place to meet after the party
You have ever seen or played in a "broom ball" game.
You have ever partied at Summerfest, Festa Italiana, German Fest, Irish Fest, Oktoberfest, or all of the above.
You or someone you know was a "Dairy Princess" at a county fair.
You can't be friends with a Vikings fan
Your idea of diversity is having black, white, and brown cows.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Wisconsin.
Senara-ism : Life is like a theatrical production only you get to be actor, director, and audience all at once. So break a leg, sit back and enjoy the show!
"When the waves are high and the light is dying, raise a glass and think of me..." -Gaelic Storm
Cha chòir dòrn a thoirt an aghaidh pòig.
A kiss ought not to be met with a fist.
Thig crioch air an saoghal, ach mairidh gaol is ceòl.
The world will pass away, but love and music last forever.
"I am a crazy, rabid squirrel! I want my cookies!" Hammy-Over the Hedge
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