I have been reading this thread for a while now and it has me made think...
My father died 18 years ago but I still have my Mom. Though I always loved her and always will there are things which happened and hurt me , things she refused to talk about.
These unspoken problems have worked on me in a way which was giving me a hard time because I needed to pull back emotionally in order to bear the situation.
After my birthday in September I got a call from Mom that she was planning to visit me with my sister; both haven't been here for 5 years and I haven't seen them for 3 years.
My emotions were very mixed; kind of joy and fear and doubts.
But then the day arrived and they visited me one Friday night. When Mom stepped out of the car my heart widened and I gave her a hug and held her close to me. Same with my sister.
We spent a very good time. Though I know that the things I always wanted to talk about will remain unspoken I enjoyed to have them with me and I felt I finally could let go. It was a time, so peaceful and in harmony that this big rock moved from my soul and gave way for all the love I feel for Mom. I could forgive and let go, I made peace with her; no words were necessary, we both could feel it and that did the trick.
Mom is 73 yrs. old now, and she's getting old. Older. Still in good condition but it made clear to me that the time still left for us is limited.
I can't go to see her because my step-father who is a very hard man wouldn't let me into their place - long story. We decided to see each other more often now. My sister will pick up Mom for some more visits, the first one will still be this year, before Xmas.
So this visit I was a bit worrying about before that day was a blessing to all of us.
"Now here's my secret", said the fox, "it is very simple. It is only with ones heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye."
("The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
"The soul would have no rainbow, if the eye had no tears."
(Native American Proverb)