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blackcloud1129 
Posted: 08-May-2007, 09:50 AM
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In Honor of Stupid People . . .
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.









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On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)






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On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)






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On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)






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On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)






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On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)






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On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)






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On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)






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On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)






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On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....)






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On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."


(as opposed to what?)




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On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."


(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)




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On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."


(talk about a news flash)




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On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."


(Step 3: say what?)




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On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."


(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one)




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On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."


was there a lot of this happening somewhere?




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Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle)...














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RebeccaAnn 
Posted: 08-May-2007, 10:18 AM
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How the chainsaw one got started was some guy actually did try to stop the chainsaw with his genitals. Needless to say, he won the Darwin Award that year.
I got one for you. Just got a new computer. Only manual available is on the computer. First direction: Turn on computer.
Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.

Electric scooter directions:
On roads with heavy traffic or roads that are muddy, gravely, bumpy, narrow, snowed
over, icy, or paths not guarded by any fence or hedge. Keep away from places where you
might get the wheels stuck.
Do not drive at night or when it is raining, snowing, misty, or windy.

Who in their right mind would drive anything that only goes 6 miles an hour in heavy traffic or in snow and rain, etc.
Do not take the scooter onto escalators.
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Aaediwen 
Posted: 08-May-2007, 04:32 PM
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QUOTE (Rebecca Ann @ 08-May-2007, 10:18 AM)
How the chainsaw one got started was some guy actually did try to stop the chainsaw with his genitals.  Needless to say, he won the Darwin Award that year.
I got one for you.  Just got a new computer.  Only manual available is on the computer. First direction: Turn on computer.
Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.

Electric scooter directions:
On roads with heavy traffic or roads that are muddy, gravely, bumpy, narrow, snowed
over, icy, or paths not guarded by any fence or hedge. Keep away from places where you
might get the wheels stuck.
Do not drive at night or when it is raining, snowing, misty, or windy.

Who in their right mind would drive anything that only goes 6 miles an hour in heavy traffic or in snow and rain, etc.
Do not take the scooter onto escalators.

As for that manual... I have spoken with way too many idiots out there for whom even this instruction would be way too technical. They would somehow find the manual... Maybe manage to read that instruction, and be thinking "And how on Earth am I supposed to do THAT???"

As for the scooter, I can fully understand why, perticularly if someone uses it as a way to get around a campus of some kind, that they might try some of these scenerios.

You're forgetting, that most of these top notch stupid instructions exist because there are too many people out there stupid enough to need them. Like the guy who put his brand new RV on cruise so that he could go get a cup of coffee, and then got a new RV out of the company because the instructions didn't tell him the vehicle wouldn't drive itself.

HELLOOOO!!!!! GENUIS!


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valpal59 
Posted: 09-May-2007, 10:15 AM
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subhuman 
Posted: 26-May-2007, 01:23 PM
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QUOTE
Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.

Ran into something similar about ten years back. Bought a new computer motherboard, only to find out that the manual was on a CD-ROM. While I had over a dozen computers at that time, it was no big deal for me to pop the CD into one of them to get jumper settings.
I just feel bad for the poor bastards who were expecting to build their first computer with that thing...


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Drinking is a sport. In order to be competitive, you must practice on a regular basis. Although you can practice alone, it is much more fun to practice with friends. If you're out of shape and practice too hard, you will regret it the next day.

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rpeirson 
Posted: 27-Jul-2007, 11:51 AM
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Those are very good, put a chucle in my day. Tahnks


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Donajhi 
Posted: 29-Aug-2007, 02:40 PM
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