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> Men Are Happier, What do you expect from such simple crea
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dundee 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 09:19 AM
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ZodiacReed


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here is an intresting study just in.


biggrin.gif MEN Are Just Happier
What do you expect from such simple creatures?

1. Your last name stays put.

2. The garage is all yours. (notice i am being squeezed out of mine though)

3. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

4. Chocolate is just another snack.

5. You can be President.

6. You can never be pregnant.

7. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

8. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

9. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

10. The world is your urinal.

11. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

12. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

13. Same work, more pay.

14. Wrinkles add character.

15. Wedding dress $5000; Tux rental-$100.

16. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

17. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

18. One mood all the time.

19. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

20. You know stuff about tanks.

21. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

22. You can open all your own jars.

23. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

24. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

25. Your underwear is $7.95 for a three-pack.

26. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

27. You almost never have strap problems in public.

28. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

29. Everything on your face stays its original color.

30. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

31. You only have to shave your face and neck.

32. You can play with toys all your life.

33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.

34. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.

35. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

36. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

37. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..

38. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
biggrin.gif


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jim

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"If I say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, I meant it the other way."

often in error, never in doubt.

if guns kill people then my pencil mis-spells words
quote: larry the cable guy

sometimes what ya think ya want
isnt what ya thought ya wanted
till ya get what ya thought ya wanted
and then what ya had is gone....
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haynes9 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 10:18 AM
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ZodiacElder

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I never realized I was so happy biggrin.gif !

Great stuff!


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For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved - Romans 10:13 (KJV)

The Lord is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble, and he knoweth them that trust in him - Nahum 1:7 (KJV)
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Shadows 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 11:20 AM
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ZodiacHolly

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I always though it was because we only had basic needs:

Sex, food, sex, drink, sex , sleep, sex, reading material in the john, sex, peace and quite, sex, and a partner that could provide all of the above.

LOL!!!!


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IMAGINATION - the freest and largest nation in the world!


One can not profess to be of "GOD" and show intolerence and prejudice towards the beliefs of others.

Am fear nach gleidh na h–airm san t–sith, cha bhi iad aige ’n am a’ chogaidh.
He that keeps not his arms in time of peace will have none in time of war.

"We're all in this together , in the parking lot between faith and fear" ... O.C.M.S.

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"Without food we are nothing, without history we are lost." - SHADOWS


Is iomadh duine laghach a mhill an Creideamh.
Religion has spoiled many a good man.

The clan MacEwen
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Dogshirt 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 05:28 PM
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ZodiacElder

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Ain't life GRAND!!! tongue.gif Now if we could just get past that whole "seat up- seat down" thing it would be perfect!


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Irish Stepper 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 09:35 PM
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ZodiacOak

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I don't let that part bug me much. I figure I can just as easily put the seat down myself. I'm the only female in the house with 3 males. However, in the middle of the night as you're stumbling around in the dark to go to the bathroom is a different story...NOT a nice way to wake up by falling into the toilet. laugh.gif wink.gif rolleyes.gif


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Robert Phoenix 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 10:13 PM
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A friend of mine once told me that men have sex like they shop. In, out, done.


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dundee 
Posted: 01-Sep-2006, 10:29 PM
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QUOTE (Roberto Phoenix @ 01-Sep-2006, 10:13 PM)
A friend of mine once told me that men have sex like they shop. In, out, done.

just not going to touch that one....no no way


and huzzah to irish stepper... a logical female... biggrin.gif
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Shadows 
Posted: 02-Sep-2006, 06:33 AM
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Now if we can just get rid of those fuzzy toilet seat covers....


Stumble in the bathroom in the dark thinking the seat is up... well you dont lnow it isn't until it is too late....LOL!
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zeryx 
Posted: 02-Sep-2006, 12:40 PM
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wink.gif but men - just look at what you miss out on!!

1. You have variety with your name.

2. The garage is someone else's responsibility biggrin.gif

3. Wedding plans are great fun to make!

4. Chocolate is ... well, chocolate!

5. You can be President - do we really want to be wink.gif

6. Pregnancy is a wonderful biggrin.gif

7. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park - why?! lol.gif wink.gif

8. We can oggle men with no t-shirts on in the water park.

9. Car mechanics can be wound round your finger and will do work for cheap wink.gif

10. The world is your urinal - um OK - I'll give you that one

11. We don't pick up bugs from dirty bathrooms.

12. We think about turning nuts and bolts, but we also read instructions wink.gif

13. We enjoy our men having money and spending it on us.

14. We enjoy eyeing up men with those character building wrinkles.

15. We look pretty and feel good in our wedding dresses.

16. The occasional well-rendered belch shocks and gets us noticed!

17. New shoes are great fun to buy!

18. One mood all the time - as do we ... woman mood wink.gif

19. We love communicating by telephone and have great fun chatting to our friends/family.

20. We can learn about tanks if we wish to.

21. A five-day vacation is a wonderful opportunity to buy new clothes!

22. We get our lovely men to flex their muscles when opening our jars smile.gif

23. Our men do sometimes surprise us with lovely acts of thoughtfulness.

24. If someone forgets to invite us we have fun elsewhere.

25. Buying underwear is a great excuse to shop!

26. Shoe shopping is another great excuse to shop!

27. wink.gif You can tease men with strap problems.

28. We enjoy going out well groomed without wrinkles in our clothes.

29. We can change our looks to suit our outfit/mood.

30. We can change our hair to suit the occasion.

31. We have to shave less than men.

32. We can play with toys all your life - they're just different to men's toys!

33. .... OK can't think of a retort to this one - suggestions please ladies!

34. Buying purses to match shoes is another great reason to shop!

35. We can wear anything we want, skirts, shorts, long/cropped trousers ... men have only long/sort trousers - and we can shop to buy more!

36. It's therapeutic to sit and 'do' your nails.

37. We can enjoy our men with their moustaches wink.gif

38. Well - Christmas - what a fantastic reason to SHOP!!!!


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Irish Stepper 
Posted: 03-Sep-2006, 09:22 AM
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lol.gif I love the retorts! I can't really think of one for #33 either. Except for the fact that no matter how big our hips are, some man out there is going to think they're HOT. I don't know of any women who think a beer gut on a guy is sexy. wink.gif
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gaberlunzie 
Posted: 11-Sep-2006, 01:45 PM
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Loved the study AND the retorts - and I totally agree laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif


--------------------
"Now here's my secret", said the fox, "it is very simple. It is only with ones heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye."

("The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint-Exupery)


"The soul would have no rainbow, if the eye had no tears."
(Native American Proverb)
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dundee 
Posted: 11-Sep-2006, 04:58 PM
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zeryx..... *L* you have to much time on your hands. did you stay up all night?
i should have known there would be retort.... but never on all of them....

regarding #33 that could get ugly.... there is a limit to hips size too.... and i have known plenty of women that actually liked a bit of "beer belly" i think their might be a limit there also... but alas sexy is in the eye of the beholder.... thinking these are the women writing in the "hunks in kilts" thread .... remember what bigger hunk is there than "fat bastard" and he says he is "dead sexy" *L* especially in his kilt.... biggrin.gif
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sisterknight 
Posted: 12-Sep-2006, 08:08 AM
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yeah z!!!!! you go girl!!

i heard a wonderful comparsion:

men are like dogs - sleep, eat, sex, poop!!!
women are like cats - independant and i don't give a s**t what you think!!

any comments???


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non nobis domine,non nobis sed nomini tua da gloriam.


OKAY, WHAT DID I DO NOW??
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dundee 
Posted: 12-Sep-2006, 08:41 AM
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wow what started as a little spoof and fun is getting ugly....
no comment cause i dont give a pooh anymore...
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sisterknight 
Posted: 12-Sep-2006, 08:49 AM
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no it's not....ugly is what you use two bags for!!!hehehe wink.gif
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