Darwin Was Right, The fit survive, the unfit don't

I do! Every time I think of this one, I get a chuckle. Definately a classic!

Me, too. You know, I wondered why umbrellas seem to open with less force than they used to... the guy's family probably sued. It may not have happened in our great land of litigation, but maybe they'd visited recently, or something.
Here's one I betcha didn't know about:

Historical Darwin Award

Attila the Hun was one of the most notorious villains in history. He conquered all of Asia by 450 A.D. by destroying villages and pillaging the countryside. This bloodthirsty man died from a nosebleed on his wedding night. After feasting and toasting his own good fortune, he was too drunk to notice his nose, and he drowned in a snoutful of his own blood.

I guess that'd be a good example of hubris.
So, how many of y'all been that drunk, honestly?

I think I was, but I don't remember very much about it.

I remember waking up one morning on my back in a rice field with no memory of getting there, or where "there" was. I cautiously approached the rice farmer, who had been studiously ignoring me, and asked him where a city was. I tried several languages before he understood me. After laughing so hard he sat down, he pointed to the south and said "Bangkok". I was only a couple of miles from the edge of town. I must have wandered out there in my "cups". My buddies in the unit (we were on R&R) were usually better at keeping track of me.....
I was just glad that it happened in Thailand...

Sounds like you really "Thai'd one on".

Boooooooo!

Not quite a Darwin, but a Genius nonetheless.

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A Des Moines teenager charged Saturday with failure to maintain control of her car and violation of an instruction permit in a freeway crash said snacking on an ear of corn while driving did not contribute to the mishap.

"I was paying attention," said Khanh Minh Thi Quach, 17. "This is very new in my life; I've never had an accident before."

One of the children in the other vehicle who was hurt in the crash had just competed in the 1,500 meter racewalk event at the 2004 AAU Junior Olympics.

Police Officer Robert Cornwell thought the corn snacking was important enough to mention in his report. He wrote, "Witness said (Quach) was distracted because she was eating corn on the cob while driving."



The accident occurred on the far west side of Des Moines on Interstate Highway 235. Westbound traffic was coming to a stop where lanes narrow for construction, police said. Quach said she hit her brakes "maybe too hard."

Her car slid 129 feet and another westbound car driven by Charvaise Butler of Capitol Heights, Md., collided with it. Butler's husband, Zachary Butler, 34, and children Alnae Butler, 7, and Darrian Butler, 9, were taken to Iowa Methodist Medical Center for treatment. None of the injuries were believed to be life-threatening, police said.

http://www.desmoinesregister.com/apps/pbcs...10340/1001/NEWS

OK people, I enjoy an ale or a wee dram as much as the next person. And I've also spent many younger days at a major university consuming adult beverages. But this is a bit over the top.

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Officials: Dead Woman Had Up to 40 Drinks

By DAN ELLIOTT
Associated Press Writer

FORT COLLINS, Colo. ? A 19-year-old college student drank up to 40 beers and shots of liquor in an 11-hour period before she was found dead in a fraternity house, investigators said Friday.

Samantha Spady had a blood-alcohol level of 0.436 percent ? above the 0.4 percent considered potentially deadly ? when her body was found Sept. 6 at the Sigma Pi fraternity house at Colorado State University, Deputy Coroner Dean Beers said.

Spady drank the equivalent of 30 to 40 12-ounce beers or 1-ounce shots of liquor, Beers said, but her death was ruled an accident and there was no evidence of foul play. Spady was found fully clothed, and her body had not been moved.

Spady began drinking with companions at 6 p.m. on Sept. 5 and did not stop until about 5 a.m. the next day. Investigators said Spady and her friends started with beer but later switched to vodka.

Spady's body was found in a lounge of the fraternity house by a fraternity member giving a tour the evening of Sept. 6. Beers said Spady probably died about midmorning that day.

http://www.ajc.com/news/content/shared-gen...nity_Death.html

Colfax man dies following bizarre mishap at home
Bee Regional Staff
Published 2:15 am PST Thursday, November 18, 2004

Placer County sheriff's officers are speculating that a Colfax man who was found burned to death this month had stuck his booted feet in an oven to warm them.

The boots apparently caught fire and the victim ran through the house as other clothing began to catch fire, said Lt. George Malim.

The man then ran outside, fell on a pile of broken bottles, got up and tried to run again before collapsing and dying in the back yard, Malim said.

"It had to be a horrible and painful death as he ran in a panic," Malim said. "He lived alone. No one was there to help."

The victim, Grant John Wilson, 43, had a history of mental illness, the lieutenant said.

Wilson's father discovered the body at his son's home on Placer Hills Road when he went to check on him, Malim said. It appeared the body had been there for several days, he said.

Investigators found the oven turned on and its door open, leading them to believe Wilson had put his feet inside, Malim said.

http://www.sacbee.com/content/community_ne...-12364276c.html

Dumb and Stupid, but interesting, thanks for sharing.

SYDNEY (Reuters) - Bemused diners watched as three hapless thieves unsuccessfully tried to kick open a sliding door in a botched attempt to rob an Australian seafood restaurant, police said on Monday.
The men, wearing balaclavas, ran off empty-handed but left their bootprints on the industrial-strength glass door in a robbery bid that Australian Broadcasting Corp. radio said could have been mistaken as "a rehearsal for a slapstick comedy."

Police said about 20 diners watched as the men, one of whom was carrying a knife, tried to push open the door of the restaurant in the coastal village of Gerringong, 140 km (85 miles) south of Sydney, and then began kicking the glass.

"They're probably more dangerous because they're dumb," police investigator Jamie Williams said.

Restaurant owner Greg Moore said diners remained calm as they watched events unfold while enjoying dessert and coffee.

"The door's open, the sign says 'Slide' but obviously with their balaclavas they couldn't read too well," Moore said.

What makes him think the balaclavas had anything to do with it?

The gene pool cleans up itself!

Here is another, from CNN:

KENT, Washington (AP) -- A man who placed a lava lamp on a hot stovetop was killed when it exploded and sent a shard of glass into his heart, police said.

Philip Quinn, 24, was found dead in his trailer home Sunday night by his parents.

"Why on earth he was heating a lava lamp on the stove, we don't know," Kent Police spokesman Paul Petersen said Monday.

After the lamp exploded, Quinn apparently stumbled into his bedroom, where he died Sunday afternoon, authorities said.

Police found no evidence of drug or alcohol use.

Are people really this dumb? They must truly come from the shallow end of the gene pool!

Are you forgetting some of our relatives in Ririe?