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Posted: 07-Apr-2005, 10:52 PM
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Reader of souls, vision seeker, TROLL
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"Bad triumphs over good, again"

In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, combined with an abundance of green, yellow and red vegetables. He did this that man and woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then, using god's bountiful gifts, Satan created whipped cream and ice-cream.

And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?"

And man said: "Yes!"

And Woman said: "I'll have one too... with sprinkles."

And lo, 10 pounds was gained unto them.

And so God created healthful yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane, and combined them.

And Woman went from size six to size sixteen.

So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad."

And Satan presented crumbled blue cheese dressing and garlic bread on the side.

And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth deep-fried calamari rings, butter-dipped lobster chunks and fried chicken so big it needed its own platter.

And Man's cholesterol went through the roof.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition.

Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep-fried them in animal fats, adding copious quantities of salt.

And Man packed on more pounds.

God then brought forth running shoes that his children might lose those extra pounds.

And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.

And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy lycra jogging suits.

God then gave lean beef that man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created McDonald's and the 99 cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with that?"

And Man replied: "Yes! And supersize them!"

And Satan said: "It is good."

And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed... and created quadruple by-pass surgery.

Satan chuckled and created... The Public Health System

I support the separation of church and hate!

IMAGINATION - the freest and largest nation in the world!

One can not profess to be of "GOD" and show intolerence and prejudice towards the beliefs of others.

Am fear nach gleidh na hairm san tsith, cha bhi iad aige n am a chogaidh.
He that keeps not his arms in time of peace will have none in time of war.

"We're all in this together , in the parking lot between faith and fear" ... O.C.M.S.

Beasts feed; man eats; only the man of intellect knows how to eat well.

"Without food we are nothing, without history we are lost." - SHADOWS

Is iomadh duine laghach a mhill an Creideamh.
Religion has spoiled many a good man.

The clan MacEwen
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Posted: 08-Apr-2005, 07:50 AM
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Wanderer and Vagabond

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Joined: 12-Mar-2004

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LOL! Good one, Shadows! Ain't it the truth! TV is not my weakness, it's the computer! I spend way to much time surfing when I could be out walking! And why is it ALWAYS that the things that taste the best are the worst for you! Never understood how that worked!

Sln agus beannachd,
Allen R. Alderman

'S i Alba tr mo chridhe. 'S i Gidhlig cnan m' anama.
Scotland is the land of my heart. Gaelic is the language of my soul.
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Posted: 12-Apr-2005, 12:11 PM
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Too True biggrin.gif
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Posted: 30-May-2005, 12:04 AM
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Celtic Guardian

Group: Celtic Nation
Posts: 6,919
Joined: 09-Nov-2003

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laugh.gif laugh.gif Good one, Shadows! thumbs_up.gif

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