In Honor of Stupid People . . . In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle)...
How the chainsaw one got started was some guy actually did try to stop the chainsaw with his genitals. Needless to say, he won the Darwin Award that year. I got one for you. Just got a new computer. Only manual available is on the computer. First direction: Turn on computer. Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.
Electric scooter directions: On roads with heavy traffic or roads that are muddy, gravely, bumpy, narrow, snowed over, icy, or paths not guarded by any fence or hedge. Keep away from places where you might get the wheels stuck. • Do not drive at night or when it is raining, snowing, misty, or windy.
Who in their right mind would drive anything that only goes 6 miles an hour in heavy traffic or in snow and rain, etc. Do not take the scooter onto escalators.
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QUOTE (Rebecca Ann @ 08-May-2007, 10:18 AM)
How the chainsaw one got started was some guy actually did try to stop the chainsaw with his genitals. Needless to say, he won the Darwin Award that year. I got one for you. Just got a new computer. Only manual available is on the computer. First direction: Turn on computer. Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.
Electric scooter directions: On roads with heavy traffic or roads that are muddy, gravely, bumpy, narrow, snowed over, icy, or paths not guarded by any fence or hedge. Keep away from places where you might get the wheels stuck. • Do not drive at night or when it is raining, snowing, misty, or windy.
Who in their right mind would drive anything that only goes 6 miles an hour in heavy traffic or in snow and rain, etc. Do not take the scooter onto escalators.
As for that manual... I have spoken with way too many idiots out there for whom even this instruction would be way too technical. They would somehow find the manual... Maybe manage to read that instruction, and be thinking "And how on Earth am I supposed to do THAT???"
As for the scooter, I can fully understand why, perticularly if someone uses it as a way to get around a campus of some kind, that they might try some of these scenerios.
You're forgetting, that most of these top notch stupid instructions exist because there are too many people out there stupid enough to need them. Like the guy who put his brand new RV on cruise so that he could go get a cup of coffee, and then got a new RV out of the company because the instructions didn't tell him the vehicle wouldn't drive itself.
"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
Duh. if I didn't know how to find the power switch and turn it on how would I be able to read the manual telling me to turn it on.
Ran into something similar about ten years back. Bought a new computer motherboard, only to find out that the manual was on a CD-ROM. While I had over a dozen computers at that time, it was no big deal for me to pop the CD into one of them to get jumper settings. I just feel bad for the poor bastards who were expecting to build their first computer with that thing...
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I have two modes: wiseass and dumbass. Mode is determined by current blood alcohol level.
Drinking is a sport. In order to be competitive, you must practice on a regular basis. Although you can practice alone, it is much more fun to practice with friends. If you're out of shape and practice too hard, you will regret it the next day.
Life is a disease. It is sexually transmitted and always terminal.