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| Celtic Radio Community > The Jester's Court > Men Are Like........ |
| Posted by: shuggieduggie 01-Oct-2007, 12:21 PM |
| 1. Men are like .. Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you. 2. Men are like. Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are. 3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them. 4. Men are like . Blenders You need One, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are like . Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like . Commercials ....... You can't believe a word they say. 7. Men are like Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off! 8. Men are like ...... Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature. 9. Men are like ..... Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion. 10. Men are like Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while. 11. Men are like Snowstorms .... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. 12. Men are like . Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright. 13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped. |
| Posted by: haynes9 06-Oct-2007, 09:15 AM |
| Shuggie, you're killin' me! |
| Posted by: Donajhi 02-Mar-2009, 07:08 PM |
| LET'S WAKE THIS ONE UP. It might have been posted in 2007 but still right on today in 2009. I gotta give a big, "THANK YOU, SHUGGIE", FOR THIS ONE AND YES I KNOW I AM SHOUTING.............   |
| Posted by: Camac 03-Mar-2009, 08:36 AM |
| Shuggie; You forgot one: "LORD AND MASTER OF ALL WE SURVEY" Camac.  |
| Posted by: flora 03-Mar-2009, 09:47 AM |
Is that with or without glasses? Flora |
| Posted by: Camac 03-Mar-2009, 10:05 AM |
| flora; In my case with. Can't see the end of me bluidy nose without them. Camac.  |
| Posted by: Donajhi 06-Mar-2009, 12:24 PM |
| I am not quilty of writing this. It comes from one of my friends in blue, he looks so good in his blue motorcycle pant and leather boots. Of course the gun belt is somewhat of a put off.....He is my hero anyway. Enjoy  BECAUSE I'M A MAN Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling AAA is not an option. I will win. _______________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start." We will then drink a couple of beers and break wind, as a form of holy communion. ___________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You're a woman. You never get as sick as I do, so for you, this is no problem. _________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing... _________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together. _______________________ __________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator instead (applies to engineers only) _________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about. The true answer is always either sex, cars, sex, sports or sex. I have to make up something else when you ask, so just don't ask. ________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't... and if you are feeling amorous afterwards . . . then I will certainly at least remember the name and recommend it to others. __________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it, looks fine. It does not make your ass look too big. It was the pasta and potatoes and margaritas that did that. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now? ___________________________________________________________________ Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2009, I will share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest. Like wandering around in the garden with a beer, wondering what to do. _______________________________________________________________ This has been a public service message for women to better understand men. |
| Posted by: Camac 06-Mar-2009, 01:29 PM |
| Donajhi: "YEAH BUT YOU GOTTA LOVE US"     Camac |
| Posted by: Donajhi 06-Mar-2009, 03:57 PM |
| Yes I do........... |
| Posted by: shiny 28-May-2009, 04:36 PM |
| I like both Donajhi and shuggieduggie's the same. Really funny! |
| Posted by: Faerydreamer 05-Jul-2009, 04:42 PM |
| They are both great posts. You could also say that men are like vampires...instead of blood they suck all of the energy from you. Men are like babies...they need someone to mother them. |
| Posted by: englishmix 05-Jul-2009, 04:49 PM |
| I am at loss for words... |
| Posted by: Perkeo 06-Jul-2009, 01:54 AM |
| Here's a question: If a man is in the woods by himself, Is he still wrong? |
| Posted by: Faerydreamer 07-Jul-2009, 07:19 PM |
| Well, that would depend. Why is he in the woods? Is he hunting? Is he birdwatching? Is he hiking? Is he lost? Hmmmmm...maybe we will have to wait for more information. |
| Posted by: Dogshirt 07-Jul-2009, 07:30 PM |
| Men are like......THE ROCK YOU LEAN ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You figure out what "That noise under the hood " is! You figure out why "The door is sticking"! You take the mouse out of the trap! You go downstairs and see what the damn noise is in the middle of the night, WHICH I might add, NO ONE BUT YOU heard! YOU get the lid off the Pickle, mayo, jam jar! AND, YOU DEAL with our son when he comes home drunk at 17! So, give me a damn break with this "Men are like" BS!  |
| Posted by: jmparrish 09-Feb-2012, 09:17 AM |
Quite funny, it's nice to poke fun at those we care about  The men in my life have been grand (for the most part), and they definitely share some of these examples. |