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Celtic Radio Community > Philosophy, Science & Religion > What Do You Want Done With Your Remains?

Posted by: Elspeth 23-Mar-2006, 08:43 AM
OK, I'm not being morbid, it's interesting.

This got started in another thread and some interesting alternatives to 1-800-call an undertaker were shared.

So, how do you want it done?

Posted by: Senara 23-Mar-2006, 09:12 AM
I'd like to go the same way as most of the early civilizations....on a funeral pyre with a couple coins for the boatman.

Posted by: John Clements 23-Mar-2006, 10:09 AM
As for me, I want to be wrapped in white linen, and slipped overboard, while a single piper blow’s Amazing Grace. Then everyone can have a few, and get on with fishing.


Posted by: stoirmeil 23-Mar-2006, 10:29 AM
I'm still for being cremated and sprinkled over a freshly planted field of chili peppers. Something to do with fire and the principle of life continuing. smile.gif

I wonder what Emmet will think of all this. smile.gif

Not to spoil the solemnity, but it's making me think of a chili pepper ghost story . . . you know you're haunted if your corn flakes burn your face off.

Or something. tongue.gif

Posted by: CelticCoalition 23-Mar-2006, 11:53 AM
I want to be burned to ash and have those ashes scattered with my future wife's in someplace tropical and warm.

Posted by: TheCarolinaScotsman 23-Mar-2006, 02:06 PM
Told my wife I want to be cremated. She can do as she wishes with the ashes --- put 'em in an urn, a cardboard box, toss 'em in the wind, put 'em on the garden or flush 'em. Don't really care what's done with them. If there is to be a "service", I want "The Night Pat Murphy Died" to be taken as the prototype.

Remember reading somwhere of a fellow who wanted to be cremated, his ashes mixed in a gallon of paint and the paint used to paint his widow's bedroom ceiling. unsure.gif

Posted by: sisterknight 23-Mar-2006, 04:54 PM
beer_mug.gif i'll say it again.....cremated and ashes scattered over maquapit lake, new brunswick...the funeral should just be a rowdy wake thank you very much!!!!!!!! beer_mug.gif

Posted by: Aaediwen 23-Mar-2006, 05:38 PM
lay me to rest beside my brother, with my family. in the Lane Cemetary. Wolfe, Co. Kentucky.

Posted by: MacEoghainn 23-Mar-2006, 05:53 PM
Since I won't be here I'm not really concerned with what happens to my remains, but... I have requested that a sailing buddy of mine (assuming he outlasts me) obtain a "I'd rather be sailing" bumper sticker, stick it on my coffin and replace the word "sailing" with "breathing". smile.gif

Posted by: Dogshirt 23-Mar-2006, 08:37 PM
Still want to be dressed in my outfit , wrapped in my Pendleton and hung in the big Pine. I really don't Care what Society thinks of it! wink.gif


Posted by: birddog20002001 23-Mar-2006, 10:48 PM
I think most of us have an irreverence to our own passing and I hope each of our families act in accordance with our wishes the thing is you got to let them know in advance.

Personally I certainly don't want any embalming done on my body I consider it a desecration, I want to be on the big table at my house for the wake, with all of my friends around, the bill for the drinks at the party needs to at least make everyones mouth drop. My funeral preperations which would include me wrapped in a linnen and then carried to the woods and burried on Cold Mountain NC I couldn't begin to guess how many people I have (in my family) burried in these mountains and there is no place I would rather store my frame in solitude.

Posted by: Swanny 24-Mar-2006, 03:37 AM
John Prine had a good idea in his song "Please don't bury me" Reference

My arrangements are already made, on file in the courts, legally binding and everything. I'm to be cremated and my ashes fired from my own cannon at the next Alaska State Rendezvous. That should scatter me to the winds very nicely, at about 900 feet per second.


Posted by: sisterknight 24-Mar-2006, 04:19 PM
john prine?????you know his music too????great stuff, eh

Posted by: Swanny 24-Mar-2006, 11:11 PM
Oh my, I've been listening to John Prine for a long time.... a very long time..... for so long that.....

Naw, I'm going to confess my age, but yep, I listen to John Prine. Heck, I've even heard Jerry Jeff Walker LIVE!!!!


Posted by: Shadows 25-Mar-2006, 06:08 AM
I played at the Cellar Door as opening act for Jerry Jeff Walker ...LOL!
Swanny I know your age LOL!

Posted by: Shadows 25-Mar-2006, 08:48 AM
Cremation, ashes taken to a place known here as the "rock" or "top of the world " and scattered during the migration of the raptures.
The place is a major migratory path of eagles and hawks.
Kind of a sky burial.

Posted by: Celtic cat 25-Mar-2006, 11:47 AM
Nice to know I'm not the only one. Everyone in this little town where I am thinks it is a sin to not be buried. Anyway, I do want to be cremated, and have the ashes scattered somewhere, either off the cost of Ireland or a place where wild tigers still roam. Either way both are an image of freedom to me. I'm young though, hopefully I have long time to figure it out.

Posted by: sisterknight 27-Mar-2006, 10:33 AM
QUOTE (Swanny @ 25-Mar-2006, 12:11 AM)

Naw, I'm going to confess my age, but yep, I listen to John Prine. Heck, I've even heard Jerry Jeff Walker LIVE!!!!

age is just a number!!!!!!it's how you feel that counts, and right now i'd love to feel a 25 year old!! dribble.gif drool.gif

Posted by: MDF3530 30-Mar-2006, 06:22 PM
I want to be buried. I don't want a big tombstone, just a grave marker with the logo of my beloved White Sox on it biggrin.gif ...

Posted by: Avonlea22 30-Mar-2006, 06:46 PM
Personally, I like the idea of being buried in a traditional funeral plot, preferably in a very old cemetery...but...I think I'd prefer being cremated. I'd like my ashes spread near Cape Tryon lighthouse in Prince Edward Island, Canada. That lighthouse was my special place the last two times I went up there, and I did a lot of thinking, pondering and crying there. It holds a special place in my heart, and that's where I want to be when the time comes.

Posted by: greenldydragon 02-Apr-2006, 01:34 PM
I'd like to be cremated. I don't care what my family does with my remains afterwards although I may change my mind later on (not about being cremated but afterwards).

Posted by: MDF3530 02-Apr-2006, 03:45 PM
Music I want at my funeral mass:

"Jesu, Joy of Man's Desire" by Bach
"Nearer, My God to Thee"
"How Great Thou Art"
"City of God"
"On Eagle's Wings"
"Hail Mary, Gentle Woman"
Recessional: "Highland Cathedral" played by a bagpiper

Graveside service:
"Amazing Grace" and "Going Home" from Dvorak's The New World Symphony, both played by a bagpiper

Posted by: CelticRose 05-Sep-2006, 12:38 AM
Hope I don't have to experience this for a very long time, but when that time comes I choose to be cremated. No since in taking up space in a cemetary and have some silly tomb and marker, IMHO! Hubby and I both agreed that we would cremate each other and spread our ashes in the middle of the Saguaro National Monument desert in Tucson. I have always loved the desert and here I live and here I will remain. While doing so I want bagpipes played at my memorial service with songs of Scotland the Brave and Green Hills of Tryrol! Oh! I also love the song, Mummer's Dance from Loreena McKinnett. Wonder how that would go..hee hee
Like I said. I don't plan leaving this earth for a very long time, but whenever it does happen..these are my desires!

Posted by: Maxie 05-Sep-2006, 03:22 PM
Me and my husband have agreed that we will both be cremated.Then whoever dies first the other person will take care of their ashes until they pass away.Then all being well our children will mix the ashes and scatter them over Wigtown Bay in Galloway South West Scotland. It is the birthplace of my ancestors and the place where my husband took me to recuperate after I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It is a very special beautiful place to us both. I am a free spirit (could not be placed in a box and buried) and would like the ashes to be blown over the sea.

Posted by: coastman 28-Sep-2006, 12:31 PM
My funeral would be a traditional Southern Baptist funeral. Since I cannot be buried with family members buried in Alamance County North Carolina with the first grave date of 1764, I will be buried in Lower Lotts Creek Bulloch County Georgia. All of the Georgia branch of the family is buried here. Since I am on Georgia's coast it is tempting to have your ashes spread out on the outgoing tide in Sapelo Sound. Being with the family in Life and Death is a stronger bond for me.

Posted by: fiferbob 07-Feb-2007, 09:49 AM
[SIZE=7] my dying wish is to leave this world with a taste of the highlands on my lips either Highland Park or Teanninich 27yr old just to make sure i dont come back and haunt anyone
to be followed by a cremation service with the following music
Highland Cathedral to pipe me in
Going Home by the Shadows (much better than dire straits theme from Local Hero) to see me into the fire then
Going Home by runrig to see everyone out
after that they are to have the biggest wake they can manage and make sure i am well toasted in good malt whisky
then my ashes to be scattered on the roots of the tree at the eighth hole on Sedbergh golf course in the hope that i kill the bloody tree that has caused me so much grief when playing there

Posted by: Sekhmet 07-Feb-2007, 05:56 PM
I haven't come to a firm decision yet. The idea of mouldering with the ancestors appeals to me, and lord knows we've been here for a couple hundred years. The genealogist in me wants to mark my place of burial so that future generations can find me. It's an odd sort of connection to the generations, I suppose. They may never know me, but they can at least find me. Odd, I know.

Then again, I really like the idea of being cremated and my ashes being scattered somewhere. But they'd have to be scattered propping Mama up on the mantel so that I need dusting for the love of the gods. Hm...maybe Gettysburg...they'll throw a fit, but hey.

But at any rate, I know my family is going to throw a huge funeral. Tradition and all that. I can say "don't make a big fuss out of it" all I want, I know my family. So fine. Throw the depression party first, but the first relative that thinks canned organ music is a good idea I swear I'll haunt. The first one who drags in a minister from some church I never attended to pretend he knew me is getting the second haunting. If I don't blow up the casket first.

I'm going to strongly suggest them renting a camping space, because once the fire hall wake is over and the jello salad is distributed the rest of the family and friends are gonna be drinking enough to float an aircraft carrier and setting a lot of inanimate objects on fire. Bwahahaha.

Posted by: CelticRose 07-Feb-2007, 08:41 PM
Oh gosh, Sekhmet! I am so with you on that canned organ playing stuff! I told hubby I wanted bagpipes and he was like...who the heck plays bagpipes in Arizona?! LOL I had to educate him on that one! I also agree with your mixed feelings on letting our descendants know where we are, but then they would have access to our death certificates, would they not? I mean, my dad died over 30 years ago and was buried and I have yet to find any ancestry about him! unsure.gif

Posted by: DJ Sapphira 16-Feb-2007, 10:49 AM
I need. to write up a living will. I want to be cremated on a pyre my ashes strewn to the wind-all except a lock of my hair- which I want put in a silver locket.

I'm an atheist, so NO preachers, priests, or bemoaning my soul allowed.

I wish for my funeral procession; each and every car to have blaring "Another One Bites the Dust".

I want my wake to be a celebration of my life, not mourning my death. I joke that if everyone but the children aren't drunk at the end, that I'll come back and haunt them all.

Posted by: Nova Scotian 16-Feb-2007, 08:02 PM
I don't want morners because I'll be in a better place away from this place of pain and suffering. I want to be creamated and my ashes spread in the Bay of Fundy off Cape d'Or. Not quite next to my Dad who's ashes are a few miles away but close enough. thumbs_up.gif

Posted by: Emmet 17-Feb-2007, 05:35 PM
My wife says she's going to have me cremated, put in a baggie, and sealed up in my pipe bag; my pipes will become my funerary urn.
Most of the time, she says that she's going to do this after I'm dead.

Several years ago a friend of mine, who was also a piper, died. The minister got up, said that he'd like to tell what a good man Stewart was, but in fact he'd never met the man, and he'd never darkened the door of this church. With that he sat down, and singers and musicians from across Florida who had known Stewart sang and played music; that was the funeral service. One played Stewart's penny whistle, and his little granddaughter strummed out 'Amazing Grace' on the autoharp. Afterwards, he was piped out by his old band, the Tampa Bay Pipes & Drums. Stewart would've liked it.

Afterwards, the church ladies provided the usual dry biscuits and bright red punch in the fellowship hall. I thought that I'd step down to the pub where I remember Stewart best, and have a nice pint. On arrival, I met Martin, who had been on his way to Stewart's funeral, but had been rear-ended on US-19, totaling his car. We commiserated together for our friend Stewart, Martin's car, and dry wakes in general; we decided that when our time comes, we'd much prefer that our friends gather someplace comfortable, where they can sing, play music, reminisce and tell lies, and have a pint or two of good beer, and a plate of proper food if they're hungry...a place kind of like here; our pub.

The next day, Martin had a splitting headache, the next day he was admitted to hospital, and the day after that he died of a cerebral aneurism secondary to his car accident three days ago. Exactly seven days after our conversation, I was piping Martin's wake at our pub. The house was packed; his people had flown in from Falkirk, and greatly appreciated the outpouring of sympathy by all of his friends and neighbors. We even had his brother from Scotland in blue jeans singing Country/Western on a guitar, and me in my kilt piping Scottish airs. Martin and Stewart would've liked it.

That's still how I'd like to be remembered by my friends; not stiffly uncomfortably awkwardly formal, dressed in ties and pinching shoes I never saw them wear in life, with a minister nobody knows and who I've never met reading something from my obituary and mumbling words by rote I don't believe of a faith I don't subscribe to. Besides, most Saturday or Sunday afternoons, the pub needs the business; we'd have the whole place to ourselves.

Posted by: gaberlunzie 18-Feb-2007, 04:02 PM
Emmet, I like the way of your last farewell to your friends. I'm very sure this is the way they loved to be remembered and honoured.

As for myself: I'm a registered donator of organs and cells for a long time now, so once my soul has left my earthbound body they can take anything which is still of use for anyone waiting for a transplant. The rest should be cremated.
I have been talking to my family (sons) that I prefer to be buried anonymously. Over here you have to bury the urn, you are not allowed to take it home or to scatter the ashes. So this is no option though I would have loved it that way.

I don't want a grave with a tombstone and such. I don't want my family to be in duty to care for my grave. For those who loved me I will stay where I have been during my lifetime - in their hearts. What more can one ask for?

Posted by: Druid_of_Ark 11-Dec-2007, 09:52 PM

Posted by: dfilpus 12-Dec-2007, 11:12 AM
I wish to be cremated and my ashes spread by the wind from the top of a mountain or cliff that I have enjoyed the view live. The list of places keeps changing as I climb to new places. One of the latest is the elbow in the middle of the South Harper Creek waterfall shown hear.

user posted image

Posted by: jesstuss 26-Dec-2007, 10:28 PM
I must admit I was surprised to see how many people here want to be cremated. I'm part of that majority, but I have one thing to add. My husband and I also want to have our ashes combined, but in addition to that, our little buddies who have made our life journey with us will be reunited with us for our death journey. So far, Pepi is the only one in the urn waiting, but we'll be joining him eventually again.

Our will states clearly that we want to be sprinkled on a breezy day atop the mountain we were married on. Jash is our second pet, there with us on our wedding day. Hopefully we'll live long enough to have had the privilege of hiking with a few others as well.

Posted by: Camac 04-Feb-2008, 02:16 PM

After my first heart attack my oldest daughter broached the subject of what I wanted done with my remains. I admit I was taken aback for a second or two but I soon realized that it was an important question. The first answer off the top of my head was "if you can get away with it stick me in a green garbage bag and throw me in the dumpster". That didn't go over well and it is illegal. After a short discussion I got the point across that I really didn't care what was done as I wouldn't be there. My youngest daughter took the matter in hand and informed me that when I depart this Earthly Realm I will be cremated and she would take my ashes to Loch Awe, Argyllshire and throw them to the wind blowing over the loch. Loch Awe is the ancestral land of both my families, MacArthur and Campbell.


PS: My Mother always said I was a heathen and would burn in Hell. I guess the cremation will be a precursor to where I'm spending eternity.

Posted by: mainopsman 23-Feb-2008, 06:31 PM
I'm at the age when the wife and I talk about what we want to have done when we do leave this world.

I like to get my wife going by telling her to have me stuffed, and to sit me on the sofa with a remote control in my hand. If I want to look natural its the only way.

But, the joking left aside, I wish to be buried in the cemetary that is less then a half of a mile from my house, joining my mother and father, both sets of grandparents, my great grand parents and great great grandparents. The family has been buried there since the early 1800's.

The one wish I have is that I be pipped to the church and to the grave. Being a former firefighter/Paramedic, Air Force Veteran, and a lover of the pipes this is my only wish.

JIM (mainopsman)

Posted by: UlsterScotNutt 27-Feb-2008, 12:06 PM
Hi folks,
Some great sentiments here. I have abit of my fathers ashes and the rest my mother and I will have scattered in a pretty stream he liked up near Colebrook, CT. I think the bit I have I will bring to his gggggggrandfathers burial place and leave him there. My mother wishes for her ashes to be buried under a rose bush. I think I'll bring her to the Elizabeth Park Rose Garden in Hartford, CT.

My wife would like cremation and burial , as for me, cremation, poured into a river and off to sea I go.

Off the topic abit. I still like to go into cemetaries and say the names outloud. I often wondered when was the last time their names were said outloud or they were remembered, good, bad or indifferent.

Posted by: Patch 19-Apr-2008, 04:24 PM
I have pre-paid my cremation and my ashes will be placed on the wooded hill over looking the lake with the rest of my family. A Piper will play Amazing grace with my pipes. They will then be donated to an area Pipe and Drum Corps. They say there is no greater honor than for a piper (not a very good one) to be "piped home' with his own pipes. I hope I will know this at the end. Then in the finest tradition of my Irish ancestors there will be a wake. I want one of my Scot Kilt and all accessories laid out on a table. There will be a banner indicating that it is EVERYTHING a properly dressed Scotsman wears. I only wish I could see who of my relatives and friends lift the Kilt. For live entertainment, the dance school where my wife taught will send some Step Dancers. Hopefully there will be some other live entertainment. There will be plenty of CD's. I want my passing to be a happy occasion!



Posted by: fionadunbar 05-May-2008, 07:26 AM
I'd like a minature valhalla cerimony. I'm going to buy a little boat shaped as close as possible to a viking ship and I would like my ashes and some of my blonde hair((I'm going to cut a plait and keep it specially)

I would like my family to light it i mean set it on fire) and send it out on Black Wattle Bay, Sydney Harbour. It might not turn out as romantic as I imagine but it has all the elements earth , air, fire, and water .

My mum bought a niche in the cemetary next to her father, only thing was that nowdays in Australia they only fit half the ashes in. After getting over the fact that mum wasn't going to fit into the space she had spent plenty of $$$$ on I embraced the difficulty. I took some ashes with me to scotland and scattered them in each important Dunbar place. I just couln't scatter any at Dunbar Castle though. It took me a while to figure out why. Castles are pretty violent places really and are not consecrated ground.Castles go "Rrrrraaaaaaaaaaa" and no place to leave my mum. I felt much better leaving them in churches yards and graves yards that ancestor's bones lay.Also in lovely little streams. So mum came with me overseas and had a grand scatter!

Posted by: Druid_of_Ark 06-May-2008, 09:39 PM
With much Love and respect to my friends on this site, I came close to having remains to be dealt with last Saturday I was taken tae the hospital, after an attempt tae meet with the Ancestors. I am out now and doing a wee bit better, have weekly counseling sessions fae a while though.

Posted by: norwood1026 10-May-2008, 02:18 PM
I want a very Pagan funeral I want my body set out on a raft & lit by arrows. Legally I am not sure for this is possible. If this is not possible then I want want my body in a huge bonfire & lit again I am not sure how legal this is unless you own your land. If none of this is possible then I would like my ashes scattered around my favorite tree as we believe trees are gateways to the Otherworld.

Posted by: John Clements 10-May-2008, 04:44 PM
QUOTE (norwood1026 @ 10-May-2008, 03:18 PM)
I want a very Pagan funeral I want my body set out on a raft & lit by arrows. Legally I am not sure for this is possible. If this is not possible then I want want my body in a huge bonfire & lit again I am not sure how legal this is unless you own your land. If none of this is possible then I would like my ashes scattered around my favorite tree as we believe trees are gateways to the Otherworld.

I love the flaming arrows, so I would forget about, if it’s legal or not, and just it. What are they going to do, put out the fire, and burry you in jail?

Posted by: Patch 10-May-2008, 06:36 PM
I have a bottle of Glenfiddich 30 (now 37) year old single malt and a bottle of Black Bush (About 29 yrs old now.) so all my family and friends can have one last drink with me when my ashes are scattered. The scotch would have been older but I kept drinking it and had to replace the bottle.



Posted by: ctbard 11-May-2008, 05:01 PM
QUOTE (norwood1026 @ 10-May-2008, 03:18 PM)
I want a very Pagan funeral I want my body set out on a raft & lit by arrows. Legally I am not sure for this is possible. If this is not possible then I want want my body in a huge bonfire & lit again I am not sure how legal this is unless you own your land. If none of this is possible then I would like my ashes scattered around my favorite tree as we believe trees are gateways to the Otherworld.

Ohh, a viking funeral! I don"t think it's legal though. I want to be cremated and scattered in the forest myself, but if I dies before my hubby I don"t think he"ll do that,"I"ll have to have a talk with my daughter about that", maybe she can steal my ashes and dispose of them for me, in a nice forest close by here that I love.
And all my friends can have a nice BBQ and play all my favorite tunes.

Posted by: MDF3530 15-May-2008, 05:05 PM
I want the customary Irish wake beer_mug.gif tongue.gif biggrin.gif wink.gif !

Posted by: IrishBeachLassie 05-May-2009, 11:23 PM
Well, I just read all the posts on this page regarding what's to be done when you die; every one is very unique in different ways., I love it!
About 5 years I made the arrangements for my Mother's burial; has anyone went through that lately, $10,000 bucks, least expensive, wow...My Dad was just a small fraction of that 35-40 years ago at same cemetery. My Mom had told me that she had everything arranged and not to worry which was something I didn't really want to talk about but knew I had to, and I'm just one out of 5 remaining children, it's amazing what sickness and death do to an already, I don't want to say dysfunctional, I dunno maybe, gosh selfish, self centered siblings. It seems like that Mother's documents disappeared, and that one person never came forward to say, this is what is happening...didn't mean to go off like that, I was the one my mom called on and relied on the most, the only one that could keep it together and still work a full time job, the others retired and just didn't work...
So hearing everyone's plans here gives me some pretty good ideas, I will not put the burden on my two sons.
happy in life and death! angel_not.gif

Posted by: Camac 06-May-2009, 07:30 AM

Twenty years ago it cost $10,00.00 to bury my Mother and I freaked when my Dad told me. I've made arrangements with a Funeral Home here in Oakville, $1,500.00 Cremation (all paid for). Stick you in a cardboard coffing and into the oven. Told my Daughters I don't really care what they do with the ashes. Wouldn't mind some being taken to my families home in Scotland and scattered across Loch Awe. Like I said makes no difference to me as I'm long gone by the time they get around to any of it.


Posted by: Patch 06-May-2009, 10:31 AM
Pre-paying mine cost $860.00 as I recall. I too did not want to waste the many thousands for a conventional funeral. The beauty of prepaying a cremation iis that if you are active, you do not have to be concerned about the added expense of returning a body if you expire while on vacation. They "render you down" wherever you die and send you back in a small double wall cardboard box in the back of a UPS truck.



Posted by: TinkoftheSkullyStTeam 06-May-2009, 03:21 PM
I personally just want to be cremated and to have my ashes scattered on my rose bushes to kill off the afids! smile.gif

And a nice Irish wake for a send off would be lovely!

Posted by: InRi 07-May-2009, 01:00 PM
QUOTE (TinkoftheSkullyStTeam @ 06-May-2009, 10:21 PM)
And a nice Irish wake for a send off would be lovely!

QUOTE (Finnegan's wake)
Then Mickey Maloney ducked his head.
When a bottle of whiskey flew at him,
It missed, and falling on the bed.
The liquor scattered over Tim!
Tim revives! See how he rises!
Tim finnegan rising in the bed,
Saying , "Whirling your whiskey around like blazes.
Well Holy Jesus! Do you think I'm dead?"

Do you want a second chance too? laugh.gif

Best regards

Posted by: IrishBeachLassie 07-May-2009, 10:34 PM
You guys are funny! Tink; very creative......good ole scottish send off is cool! Down with that serious stuff!

Posted by: connor1985 20-May-2009, 05:58 PM
i want to be laid out and burned with all those who i cared for standing by letting the wind blow my ashes to the ends of the world. however i would also like to have one of those little buildings but i want two knights guarding the entrence and sitting on a stone throne will be a carving of myself and it will hold my sword at the side so people have a place to go to remember me by. a little odd but it something i have thought about before. would be really cool to have the king say something like a motion sensor just for fun.

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