You all have had good points on forgiveness. I know I started this thread a while ago. I need to go back and read what I wrote at the start. I've forgotten. But, I think in the process of reading all the wise words, I have been helped to let go some. Forgiveness takes time. It often is a process but as long as I am going forward, who am I to complain?
Urian, glad to hear you are progressing on your path as well. That, my friend shows your true worth. In case you were forgetting.
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Compassion is the sometimes fatal capacity for feeling what it is like inside somebody else's skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy finally for you too. - Frederick Buechner
If society prospers at the expense of the intangibles, how can it be called progress?
I have to agree that it wont help to dwell in the past. Moving on helps to get on with someone life. But I know there are always dark moments when the past catches up and that's when all the bad feelings come back.
That's when life seems so unfair. But I guess that what life is all about. Dealing with your past.
I have to agree that it wont help to dwell in the past. Moving on helps to get on with someone life. But I know there are always dark moments when the past catches up and that's when all the bad feelings come back.
There are..and there always will be. Our trial, as we grow, is to try to keep those dark moments, where everythign seems pointless and and the darkness and sadness creeps in, that we need to remind ourselves that the past is the past, the future is what we make of it, and the present is the only thing that needs to be dealt(positively) with..
anyway...I ramble..I think I got of track..sorry
and,El, dear sweet friend O mine..I cant forget..you guys wont let me
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'Dying for being different is still better than living as a Sheep'-anon
It is not the receiveing of forgivness that is impossible to receive if you are truly sorry, it is the forgiving that is sometimes difficult to give. Give that person some space and time and don't bring up to subject and situation with anyone. I think the worst thing that can happen is once a person has appoligized they continue to try to explain themselves to everyone, let the situation rest. After awhile feel the person out and if they seem receptive great if not don't push it. I find that time does truly heal all, especially with good friends and family.
I feel like as long as you have asked for forgiveness, you cannot do anything else. It is out of your control at that point, and you have done all you can. Unfortunately, we cannot make others do what we wish they would, and that can be particularly hard when asking for forgiveness. It takes a lot of courage to apologize, and then to not be forgiven is a hard blow. But like Gwenlee said, give it some time. If that person truly cares about you, they will come back around.
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"Alas for those who never sing and die with all their music left in them" - Oliver Wendell Holmes
I truly believe that "all things are possible with God." Forgiveness is always possible. If a person does not forgive you, they are not acting Christian. You have submitted yourself to asking. If they refuse to grant forgiveness, ask God. Be truly repentant and He will forgive you.
I do not believe in the statement "forgive and forget". I think forgetting makes you vulnerable and forgetting is difficult. (but not impossible)
Here is my Forgiveness story. It is odd. I will start at the beginning: My sisters (twins) and I are 3 years apart and attended the same high school for a year. At some point, I supposedly said something about them or my parents. I have no recollection of this whatsoever. (And I have a pretty good memory of high school and can do derivitives and know my choir teacher's bday is Sept. 7th). Being in drama, most people knew that my parents would not let me drive, not teach me to and not let my get a job even in the summer. Hence, some kids probably had a preconceive notion about my parents. Anywho, since 1997 when I graduated, my sisters have not spoken to me since. I have tried saying Hello, my husband was very nice to them and tried saying Hello. They would not speak to my friends at my wedding. Nothing. We fixed the computer they use. Nothing. They still look at me like I am the dirt underneath their nails. (yes, they are 23 and still living at home).
So, I have tried asking God for forgiveness. I try to avoid them now and have stopped wasting my energy that I wasted for 8 years.
Any suggestions?
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Seize the time,. . .live now, make now always the most precious time. Now will never come again- Star Trek TNG
"The report of my death was an exaggeration." -Mark Twain, After reading his own obituary, June 2, 1897
If you ever have a world, plan ahead, don't eat it! - Star Trek TNG
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