> > > > Tennessee > > > > > > The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so > > > he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He > > > called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the > > > University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you > > > $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary > > > thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings." > > > > > > **************************************************************** > > > ***** > > > Alabama: > > > A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos > > > > for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, > > > staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" > > > the others asked.." Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple > > > of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied."You left > > > > Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. " > > > A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to > > > steal Henry!" > > > > > > **************************************************************** > > > ***** > > > Louisiana: > > > A senior at Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the > > > world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana." When asked why, he replied > > > he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana > > > 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world. > > > > > > **************************************************************** > > > > > > Mississippi: > > > The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said > > > to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the > > > > parking lot!" Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man > > > > answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number." > > > > > > **************************************************************** > > > > > > Georgia: > > > A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-75. The trooper > > > asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?" > > > > > > **************************************************************** > > > > > > > > > North Carolina > > > A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of > > > the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the > > > car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A > > > passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he > > > turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem > > > was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But > > > > what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down > > > they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I > > > never did understand it neither." > > > ******************************************************** > > > And My favorite: > > > > > > > > > You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of > > > > > > anyone retiring and moving North
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